November 5, 2024 at 10:30 a.m.
'NOD TO THE COLLAR
Whether in the Diocese of Albany or the Diocese of Rockville Centre, John Russell has always had powerfully positive interactions with priests.
“I have been blessed to have wonderful dealings with priests my whole life, from a kid as an altar server and all the way up until now,” said Russell, who for years lived on Long Island and was a parishioner at St. Rose of Lima in Massapequa and is now a parishioner at Sacred Heart in Stamford. “Obviously with the sexual abuse cases, there is so much negativity and a lot of culpability and accountability and certainly what went on was horrific, but lost in that I began to realize in talking to priests that there are so many good ones; it’s 98, 99 percent.
“I could see they were feeling beaten down a bit. It’s tough when people who don’t know any better are casting aspersions.”
Russell had long thought of how great it would be if there were a venue where people could tell their priests how much they were appreciated. It was two particular conversations, however, that stuck with Russell and pushed him to action. The first was when his son, Mark, was tragically dying of cancer at the age of 26. Russell had asked his pastor if he could come to the house and hear Mark’s confession.
“We were downstairs and he went up to Mark’s room and it was a somber time. He comes back down and as I am driving him back, I was thinking, ‘Wow what a tough job,’ ” Russell said. “He is here with a young man who is dying of cancer and people are coming to the rectory getting divorced, kids with drug problems, just an onslaught of sad stuff and I said to him, ‘Father, thank you very much for what you did but can you tell me what is something that makes you happy? What is a happy thing that you do?’
“So there was silence for about 30 seconds in the car and I am thinking, ‘Oh, you shouldn’t have asked that question.’ And then all of sudden, out of the blue, he said, ‘I’ll tell you what makes me happy: When someone comes into confession and says, Bless me father for I have sinned it’s been 30 years since my last confession.’ ” And I was like, ‘Wow, what a love for the vocation!’ ”
The second conversation was with a priest of the Diocese of Albany who he started talking with about his appreciation idea
“I was talking to him about this idea in my head and he is as good a priest as you can get, absolutely incredible in all ways shapes and forms. And he says, ‘I was out to dinner with my parents and I had to go to the bathroom and I passed through the bar area, wearing my collar, and I heard a couple of people at a table say ‘predator.’
“Those two things grounded me and said to me there is something that needs to be done here because … it is a tough time for them and there is a shortage and they are human. They are doing God’s work but they are human and what can we do to let them know that they really are appreciated. And so that’s where the idea for ’Nod to the Collar came about.”
’Nod to the Collar is an ingenious website that lets the faithful tell their busy priests how much they appreciate them. The website (nodtothecollar.com), which is entirely run and funded by lay Catholics, lets anyone express their “gratitude for clergy who have positively impacted lives. Our mission is to express love and appreciation for the thousands of devoted priests who tirelessly serve their parishes.”
You can share your appreciation through words, audio or video, and artwork
“I have prayed about it and my background has been business media. So how can we come up with something that appeals to everyone?” said Russell, whose daughter Heather, is the website’s content creator. “I just didn’t want to be able to go to 80-year-old people. I wanted to get the youth involved. Priests are at the center of our lives in so many ways, from baptism to the very end. I wanted to come up with something that could have some marketability to it. Let’s make it sound cool: ’Nod to Collar. So you give a nod, when you see someone in a crowd, if you can’t get over and talk to them, you will give them a nod and say, ‘Hey, how you doing.’ ”
It is easy to navigate the website and in just a few clicks you will have designed your very own ’Nod. There is just one simple rule: This is a safe space and only positive submissions will be accepted.
“We wanted to make this very clear right up front as we were planning this out: One, this is a ministry, this is all being funded by volunteer money and it will be that way forever and we want it to be a safe place. … We are only going to accept complimentary, good submissions. That is an absolute must.”
For more information, head to nodtothecollar.com.
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