100 PERCENT LOVE!

Joanne McKeon and Ray Germain stand at the altar of St. Joseph’s Church in Greenfield Center on their wedding anniversary, set for the renewal of their wedding vows. The two hold hands and smile at each other. The packed pews are filled with friends, family and close parishioners.

In the background, volunteers can be heard shuffling cups and food trays, setting up the party held in the back of the parish for the honored couple and guests. 

It is a special day after all: not everybody celebrates 100 years of marriage. 

McKeon, 80, and Germain, 85, have been married for a combined total of “100” years: Germain was married to his first wife, Marcia, for 55 years, while McKeon was married to her first husband, Ward, for 40 years. Both widowers, McKeon and Germain married five years ago. 

As their anniversary loomed, the couple started poking fun at their upcoming “100” years of marriage. “It started out as a joke,” Germain laughed. The more they thought about it however, the more they wanted to celebrate. A party for their marriages was the perfect reason to gather together friends and family, especially after a year of social restrictions from the pandemic.

The couple hosted their celebration on July 11 at St. Joseph’s Church. The day kicked off at 1 p.m. with a special Mass led by Father Simon Udemgba, where McKeon and Germain renewed their vows. After, it was an afternoon packed with hugs and laughter as friends and family caught up, many for the first time since the pandemic. 

“They are a rare couple,” Father Udemgba said. Originally from Nigeria, Father Udemgba has been close with McKeon for many years. After the priest joined St. Joseph’s parish in 2011, McKeon would cook meals for him as part of the church’s ministry. McKeon would call Father Udemgba on his off days and offer to drive him to visit local stops. The two would talk or pray the rosary. Now, he just calls McKeon “mom.”

“I say I’m his American mom,” McKeon said. After hearing about the couple’s party, he insisted on having it at the church so he could renew their vows.

“It’s so exhilarating,” McKeon said. “Some of these people I haven’t seen for two years because of COVID. So that is really exciting.”

GROWING TOGETHER
McKeon and Germain have a collection of photographs around their home: pictures from their many cruises, shots from parties together, and one framed photo taken at a studio with Father Udemgba standing behind the happy couple. It’s one of their more treasured shots. 

Also scattered around the house are various saints and ecclesiastical items, which is fitting for a couple deeply rooted in their faith. Both McKeon and Germain have turned to God throughout their lives, both in their previous marriages and during their new journey as a couple.

God “let me know that Ray was the person I was supposed to marry,” McKeon said.

The two first met six years ago at an interfaith ministry meeting at the Dominican Retreat and Conference Center in Niskayuna. McKeon was already a member of the ministry while Germain was coming for the first time.

Funny enough, the two attended the same church at the time, Immaculate Conception in Glenville, but had never met before. McKeon was even in the resurrection ministry for the parish and helped organize the funeral for Marcia, Germain’s wife. 

“It’s a small world,” she said.

This isn’t the first time the couple has had close encounters: the two both grew up in Schenectady and attended the same school, Mont Pleasant High School. They even shared a number of mutual friends from their hometown, but never crossed paths.

“It’s just funny how we all knew each other,” McKeon said. “But we never met until six years ago. We never ran into each other.”

In high school, Germain met Marcia when he was 16 and the two dated throughout until Germain went to Clarkson University to study engineering and Marcia went to SUNY Cobleskill, but the two ended up back together after college. The two married in 1959 and had three children together, Greg, Michelle and Scott, all baptized at their parish, Immaculate Conception. “We had a beautiful life,” he added. 

Similar to Germain, McKeon met Ward at 17, not long after graduating high school. The two attended a ski meeting and stayed in touch. McKeon waited until she was 18 to get married (advice strongly encouraged by her mother) and the two tied the knot in 1958 and had five children: Theresa, Matthew, Monica, Amanda and Mark.

No marriage was perfect, but McKeon and Germain shared wonderful years with their partners before their passing. A few years into Germain’s marriage, Marcia was diagnosed with lupus. Germain said it was sad to watch his wife suffer and she died from complications from the disease in 2014.

Before Marcia’s death, Germain began seeing a health-care coach who helped him through his wife’s death and prepared him for the next stages in his life. “You still have years to live,” Germain recalls the coach saying. If Germain met someone new, it “wasn’t a bounce back, it was living my life.”

After Ward died in 1998, McKeon never thought she would remarry. “I was a widow for over 20 years,” she said. “I ran a house, balanced a checkbook. I was financially independent. I really never thought I would get married again.”

McKeon went through a difficult period in the late 1990s: six months after her husband’s death, her father died. Less than a year later, her son, Mark, passed away. “It was a really rough time for me,” she said. “I was in church a lot.”

For years McKeon had attended St. Joseph’s Church in Greenfield, but when she moved farther south in 2005 she joined Immaculate Conception to attend Mass in the morning. Still, McKeon couldn’t leave her old church behind and still visited on the weekends.

One day, her mother-in-law took her aside and encouraged her to get back into dating. “She said you were a wonderful wife, don’t let anything stop you from letting someone into your life again.”

“I did see gentlemen throughout the years,” McKeon said, “but then I met (Germain) and things changed a little.”

LOVE AND MARRIAGE
After their first meeting, McKeon and Germain started to see each other at morning Mass at Immaculate Conception. On Germain’s birthday, McKeon insisted on taking him out after Mass at a cafe across the street. Their daily post-Mass coffee or bakery sweet turned into a tradition. 

“Then one time he couldn’t come because he had something to do,” McKeon said, “and I missed him.”

On New Year’s Eve of 2015, Germain asked McKeon to meet her at Immaculate Conception. The parish was dimmed and the two said some prayers before he took her to the front of the church. “He said, ‘Would you marry me?’ ” McKeon smiled. “And I said, ‘Yes.’ ”

As an older couple married for the second time, some things took some relearning. “My wife and I started (our lives together) when we were 22 or 23, and we grew together,” Germain said. “We had one house, one car, one checking account and we grew together as a couple for 55 years, and Joanne did similar things with Ward.

“The second marriage, though, our opinions were formed already,” he continued. “We had different opinions, and that was great, but from a marriage point of view I think the need is to deal with two people who are very different. It’s not that I’m right and you’re wrong. If there’s a winner and a loser, then it’s really two losers. If we agree great, if we don’t, then we agree to disagree.”

The two learned a lot from each other: Germain joined the senior center so he could play pinochle with McKeon. For over 20 years Germain was a volunteer with Residents Encounter Christ (REC) prison ministry; McKeon joined that, too.

Now, the two are looking forward to their next steps in life: spending time with their family, friends and growing together. 

“It’s a very beautiful thing,” said Michelle, Germain’s daughter. “We’re very proud of the love that is in the room.”