April 6, 2018 at 1:53 p.m.

YOU'LL BE SHOCKED AND AMAZED...AT HOW ESSENTIAL STORYTELLING IS FOR HUMAN BEINGS


By KATE BLAIN- | Comments: 0 | Leave a comment

Sister Anne Bryan Smollin, CSJ, loves to teach about relaxation by telling the story of a fellow woman religious who was so nervous that she had to take the $3 toll for the George Washington Bridge out of her wallet 10 miles before the bridge, just to be sure she had the money ready in time.

For Reggie Harris, freedom is best described by "The People Who Could Fly." In this story from Angola, a group of slaves so yearn to be free that they eventually become able to fly away from their captors.

"It's telling people to remember who they were, that they had dignity even in slavery and escape was possible," Mr. Harris explained.

Once upon...

Sister Anne is a frequent lecturer, author of two books of stories -- "Jiggle Your Heart and Tickle Your Soul" and "Polish Your Soul and Spruce Up Your Heart" -- and director of the diocesan Counseling for Laity office.

Mr. Harris and his wife, Kim, have spent the past 22 years as storytellers, musicians and historical interpreters in venues like schools and youth groups, creating vignettes to show how our past, present and future are interrelated.

The storytellers believe that people communicate through stories to find common ground. A good story, they agreed, is a "hook" that helps people put themselves into the situation being described, and learn something in the process.

"Stories make things real," stated Sister Anne, who uses stories both in her lectures and in counseling clients. "They relate to everyday worlds. It puts meat on whatever the point is that people are trying to make, in a colorful way."

Sense of history

Stories also give people a sense of history. Mr. Harris, whose presentations are historically and culturally based, noted that "every culture uses stories to inform about who people are."

For example, he often tells children the classic tale of John Henry. "He's such a great figure that people don't always believe he existed," the storyteller noted. "But he's such a great model for working people. As an African-American, I like to tell [his story] because he was an African-American and looked up to by so many people."

Mr. Harris also uses stories of the Underground Railroad to teach about history. "It was a multicultural and multifaith movement," he said. "It's important to hear the vision of people of that time in banding together across those lines."

Personal touch

In addition to teaching about history on a wider scope, stories help families and others hand down their personal history. Whenever Sister Anne and her fellow Sisters of St. Joseph get together, she noted, "we end up telling stories again about `what used to happen in the novitiate days.' It's those stories we still laugh about -- a wonderful thing."

Family stories "really ritualize people during holiday times," she added. "It's very important in terms of passing on traditions, histories."

For Mr. Harris, a tale told by his mother recently provided some surprising family history, as well as illustrating the need for stories: "I learned four things that I had never known about how we came to move to a certain state. My mother said, `Oh, I thought I told you all that.' I was like, `No!'"

Hearing and healing

The storyteller often urges children at his presentations to go home and ask their parents how their families came to America or other questions.

"We have to teach them to elicit stories," he said. "So much of who we are has been handed down. We remind ourselves of things we've often forgotten."

Sister Anne believes that family stories can be healing. Hearing about traditions and events from the past, she said, can let people know where certain behaviors came from in a family and "help us know the empty spaces."

Not alone

Stories can also be therapeutic because they let people know they're not alone, she said. "It's supportive. It gives people hope. It helps to know people have dealt with something similar, to deal with the stresses or the losses. Stories open up doors for us: `Somebody else did that? I could do that!'"

For this reason, Sister Anne often tells the humorous story of a diet club she once joined. "We all look for support," she explained. "There's a very important reason people are telling stories today. We're looking for a way to be full people, whole people, and stories are one way we can grow in wholeness. They also help us laugh. Because there is laughter, there is that connection. It's very non-threatening to tell a story. It's not pointing fingers."

Both storytellers are concerned with the loss of personal storytelling as the media become a more powerful influence in people's lives.

"As a culture, we've gotten somewhat away" from storytelling, said Mr. Harris; but "movies or TV are different media than being with someone, telling stories around a campfire. The impact is less personal."

Sister Anne mourns for families' lost art of "sitting on porches in rocking chairs," telling stories. "We're separate from each other," she said.

Revival

Still, the pair agreed that storytelling is undergoing a revival of sorts. While some people are trying to reclaim the tradition of storytelling, Mr. Harris said, "It's being left to the `professionals,' which I oppose. We're becoming a culture of experts. We've all just become too busy, [and] we have forgotten in some ways how important these things are to impart. We say, `We've come so far.' Young people don't know how far we've come unless we take it upon ourselves to tell those stories!"

Sister Anne pointed to the success of the "Chicken Soup for the Soul" series and similar self-help books that use stories.

"They give people some encouragement that they're not suffering things alone: `Yes, that happened to me, too.' I think that's why self-help books have taken off," she said. "I don't think they're the only way."

Keep talking

To stay connected to people, the storytellers said, tell stories yourself. "The kind of storytelling I think is wonderful is when we can connect it right now to our life -- someone's experience that's happening right now," said Sister Anne.

She recommends listening to stories, too: When visiting someone in a nursing home, she advised, ask them to tell you some stories to "get a sense of the journey the family has been on."

Mr. Harris noted that he has captivated audiences with stories from his own life. "In a school, I was asked how I became a musician," he remembered. "I started talking about growing up, how music was important to my family. That gives an overall framework for why music is so important to me, rather than saying, `Because I needed a job and music might be fun.' It gives different parameters -- not only where you have arrived, but how it is you got there and the ups and downs."

Make magic

Storytelling is about more than just the story, said the experts.

"There's something truly magical," Mr. Harris declared, "about being in the presence of someone who's a really good storyteller. The art of storytelling is also about a personal connection with voice and with personality, because everyone has a different way of telling stories, and the way they tell also tells you something about who they are as people: the way they use their voice, their eyes."

"That's how we give each other life," said Sister Anne simply. "There's life in those stories."

(Contact Kim and Reggie Harris through Charles Miller, 908-788-5000. Contact the office of Counseling for Laity at 453-6625.)

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