April 6, 2018 at 1:53 p.m.

Worry and fear focus of workshop on anxiety


By KATE BLAIN- | Comments: 0 | Leave a comment

Fill in the blank: "I'm worried about...."

Everyone has rational fears, whether it's concern about walking through a heavy crime area or dread during a health crisis. But if the fear is irrational -- if you're constantly telling yourself, "This is crazy; I've got to let this go" -- an upcoming workshop sponsored by the diocesan Consultation Center may help.

After conducting "How to Cope with Fears and Anxieties" on previous occasions, Dr. Henry Hughes, a staff member at the Center, has learned that "people come with a variety of issues. People talk about fear of what's going to happen...about a family member who has a drinking problem...about performance...about `will their family members be successful?'...about a disintegrating marriage or relationship. In a word, it's coping issues: They're not able to cope with a particular problem in their life."

Fear and anxiety

Dr. Hughes noted that there's a difference between fear and anxiety. Fear is an appraisal of danger, whether real or imagined; anxiety is the feeling that results from that appraisal.

"It's that kind of fight-or-flight signal we give ourselves," he explained. "People say, `I don't want to feel this way,' but they get stuck in it."

Anxiety can be extremely hard to give up, he said, because "people believe in the goodness of worry. People believe somehow that `if I continue to worry, I'll be on guard. I'll be more vigilant; I'll force off this impending doom.'"

Who am I?

In addition, he said, people may see their self-worth as tied to a negative evaluation from others. For example, a worrier might fret, "If I don't perform perfectly well, people are going to think badly of me, and I'll be a bad person." When they're then unable to stop feeling anxious, worriers often think, "Something is really wrong with me."

While most anxious people would deny having that train of thought, said Dr. Hughes, deep down, "they don't make a distinction between themselves and their traits. It's an overgeneralization."

During his workshop, Dr. Hughes hopes to help participants find out the beliefs that lie beneath their anxieties, challenge those beliefs and begin to give them up. But "that's not easily done," he cautioned.

Stress-relief methods like imagery and relaxation will also be a part of the workshop.

Lenten tie-in

The Evangelist's Lenten series this year is on varieties of self-improvement, but Dr. Hughes noted that it's only a coincidence that his workshop falls during Lent.

Still, he noted, "if Lent is a time for personal reflection and assessment, it's a good time to figure out, `Where in my life do I find myself feeling badly, feeling anxious?'" and change that.

Lent is also a time to make "a decision that `I need to do something to myself or for myself,'" he observed. "That's what this workshop is about. You need to work hard on changing yourself."

("How to Cope with Fears and Anxieties" will be held April 2, 7-9 p.m., at the diocesan Pastoral Center in Albany. The fee is $12. For information, call 489-4431.)

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