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The impact prison chaplains have had on my life and the lives of other men at Coxsackie Correctional Facility has been life-changing.

I came to prison for the first time in 2001: a single father, leaving behind a six-year-old boy and my mother and father to take care of him -- all of them in lots of pain, and the victim's family, too. I felt worthless to my family, my community and myself. I asked myself many times why life was worth living.

For the first nine years, Mom, Dad, my son and my cousin came to visit; then, in 2010, Mom was on life support and I was able to get a bedside visit with her. My 15-year-old son sat on my lap, with me instilling in him that Na-Na was going to rest with God. That was hard to do, being that I'd turned my back on God as a teen, blaming God for lost loved ones and for my reading comprehension disability.

After I lost Mom, I was sharing some of my loss and pain with another prisoner and he brought up Father [Richard] Shaw's Mass on Saturdays and asked if I would like to come. I said yes. After going to Mass and Bible study for a few months, I was invited to a REC [Residents Encounter Christ] retreat in 2010.

Here we are at the end of 2016, and I'm looking forward to my 14th REC. At my first REC, I was encouraged to come out of my comfort zone. I went to [the sacrament of] reconciliation and let a lot of pain and shame go that first day, and I never did look back. I took the joy of God and ran with it.

The outside team members and guys inside were great. We shared lots of prayers and tears together, walking the walk with God. Since the first REC, I've been encouraged to give my all: having fun at Mass mispronouncing the names in the readings, giving insight to college and high school students who tour the correctional facility, receiving my state license in asbestos abatement and lead maintenance.

Now, when God sends someone to help me study or read or something else out of my comfort zone, I'm good with it! All my trust is in God's hands.

In 2014, I was blessed to be confirmed. A lot of men here are different men because of God's work through Father Shaw and the outside REC ministry team. Thanks to all who have shown their love to us here and not prejudged us on our past.

(Editor's note: Rev. Richard Shaw also serves as sacramental minister for the Roman Catholic community of St. Patrick's in Athens and Catskill. For more information about REC, contact [email protected] or 518-417-1625.)[[In-content Ad]]

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