Saratoga home is final haven for the dying

Sitting on the couch at Mary's Haven, a green-shingled house in Saratoga Springs, Anne Reed is bent over a weathered scrapbook that is falling apart from too much perusal.

Inside are photographs of the residents of the house. They are wearing sombreros and bunny ears, smiling broadly, holding hands with their spouses, and opening birthday presents.

In another scrapbook are their obituaries.

Memories

Mary's Haven is the Albany Diocese's only community home for the dying. Since it opened in early 2003, it has been the last home for 17 terminally ill residents of Saratoga.

"I just keep taking pictures, so that we'll have these memories," said Mrs. Reed, Mary's Haven coordinator. "They were all so beautiful in their own way. All so different."

Funded by Catholic Charities and affiliated with the Community Hospice, the center's goal is to "provide a hospitable, home-like setting where [residents] can die with dignity," said Sister Charla Commins, CSJ, director of Catholic Charities of Saratoga, Warren and Washington counties. "It's a place for people who want hospice services but who do not have a primary caregiver -- or whose primary caregiver can no longer care for them."

Two rooms

Mary's Haven has only two rooms. On the day The Evangelist visited, an elderly woman slept in the yellow room, her delicate white hair a halo around her head.

In the blue room, a woman sat by her sleeping husband's side. She has brought pictures of his mother and other family members to comfort him.

A photo of the couple themselves is draped by a rosary with wooden beads, and a Yankees banner hangs cheerily from behind a picture on the wall.

Volunteers

Volunteers are needed to keep Mary's Haven open: people trained in giving medicine, patient care, and handling emergencies. Currently, the home boasts between 75 to 100 volunteers, depending on the month and their own schedules.

"Volunteers are the heart and soul of our program," said Mrs. Reed, a parishioner of St. Edward the Confessor parish in Clifton Park.

Although a registered hospice nurse, chaplain and other staff visit the home on a regular basis, it's the volunteers -- nurses, healthcare workers, retirees, college students and stay-at-home moms -- who do much of the daily work, she said. They get extensive training and work with a mentor before taking on solo shifts.

Picking residents

Residents are referred to Mary's Haven through hospices, hospital discharge planners and word-of-mouth. From the applications -- far more than the home can accommodate -- the staff chooses people who have the "greatest need and the fewest options," Mrs. Reed explained.

The average stay at Mary's Haven is three months, which is longer than at most hospices.

"Our [goal] is to meet people where they are, help tend to their needs, and do that with grace and joy," Sister Charla said. "We help each other see that this is a natural stage of life. We see it as a privilege to get to walk with someone on this journey."

(For information, call Mary's Haven, 584-9397.)