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Rachel's Vineyard, an international organization sponsoring healing retreats for people who have had abortions or have been touched by abortion, will offer a retreat in the Albany Diocese May 13-15.

"Judy" (name withheld for privacy reasons) says she wants to "spread the word about Rachel's Vineyard. So many people have been touched by it."

Judy attended her first Rachel's Vineyard retreat weekend three years ago. Since then, she has returned as a facilitator for the retreats.

"You have to go through a lot of unearthing of painful feelings," she told The Evangelist. During her own experience, "there was a lot of crying."

Rachel's Vineyard was created in 1994 by Theresa Burke after she wrote the book "Rachel's Vineyard: A Psychological and Spiritual Journey for Post-Abortion Healing." The book mapped out a model for a support group that would be a healing experience for women who were mourning a child they had aborted.

From a grassroots outreach, the organization quickly grew into an international retreat program. According to its website, www.rachelsvineyard.org, there were 18 retreats held in 1999; now, there are more than 1,000 held annually in 57 countries and 48 U.S. states.

The first Rachel's Vineyard retreat in the Albany Diocese was offered in 2010 under the direction of Pat Mousaw, who is still involved as a group leader today.

"What we're basically about is healing and reconciliation of people after abortion," Mrs. Mousaw said. "This could heal the heart."

For Judy, it did. Before the retreat, she said, "When bad things happened in my life, I thought it was payback."

But "I realized that, over the course of the weekend, that decision in that moment [to have an abortion] does not define who you are in your heart and does not separate you and does not make you not a child of God anymore."

One of the main parts of Judy's journey with Rachel's Vineyard revolved around shame.

"I had shoved it so deep into my bones that I didn't realize how it was still affecting me," she said. She came to realize "how the energy of shame affected my belief about why bad things happen.

"The biggest shift was not feeling this hidden, shameful part of my past anymore by being able to express my sorrow and ask for forgiveness, to stand up and voice it."

The weekend retreats help people affected by abortion heal through exercises like watching films, personal reflection and listening to inspirational music. "Each facilitator plays a role in kind of peeling back the layers that have been built up," said Judy. "We actually bring these really large stones where you carry those throughout the weekend until you feel like you can let it go."

After the retreat, she said, she was able to feel forgiveness, as if she was "finally lifting a deeply-held feeling of shame. I'm much more comfortable expressing my faith now."

Judy also says that many of her personal relationships have been strengthened because of the healing she found through Rachel's Vineyard.[[In-content Ad]]

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