Parish mourning loss of good man

St. Paul the Apostle parish in Hancock never expected to earn the distinction of being the first in the Albany Diocese to grieve for a parish life director.

Their administrator, Robert Carpenter, died April 2 at the age of 72. Parishioners say the loss of the lay leader leaves a gap they will have to work hard to fill.

"He blended in from the first day he was here," declared Paul Bartholomew, head of the parish council. "I don't know how he gained so much respect so quickly. His wit and dedication to what he did overwhelmed everybody."

Spirituality

Parish secretary Kate Antidormi opined that it was Mr. Carpenter's spirituality that quickly made parishioners comfortable around him. She noted that the administrator was often mistaken for a priest, even among people he'd previously corrected on that count.

"He'd say, 'I'm not a Father, I'm a layperson,'" she remarked. "Sometimes, it took three or four times" for people to understand.

The secretary recalled Mr. Carpenter's introduction to the parish as "an answer to a prayer." Ironically, the previous pastor, Rev. James Cribbs, had died in 1998 at just 36, having led the parish for only a short time.

Larger role

Mr. Carpenter was appointed administrator of St. Paul's in 2002. He previously worked in the fiscal office of Albany diocesan Catholic Charities for five years and had completed the diocesan Formation for Ministry program. He wanted to take on a larger role in parish life.

According to parishioners, that's exactly what he did: "Bob did everything except hear Confessions and say Mass," said Mr. Bartholomew. "He was a people person."

As such, Mr. Carpenter joined Hancock's Rotary Club and reached out to churches of other denominations, pitching in at ecumenical soup suppers during Lent and at the local food bank.

"He just had a way about him. He went shopping at the local food store and met people," Mrs. Antidormi remarked. "If they needed anything, he'd listen and do what he could. He sort of grew on us."

Busy man

The secretary chuckled at the many tasks her boss had handled: A typical "day at the office" brought everything from local residents asking for help with their rent to couples looking for information on marriage regulations.

Mr. Carpenter also worked in tandem with Rev. Stephen Morris, the sacramental minister, to provide spiritual consolation to parishioners and non-Catholics alike. For example, Father Morris would offer funeral Masses, but Mr. Carpenter would accompany families to the cemetery afterward and offer prayers for the deceased.

"He did so many things that no one knew he was doing," Mrs. Antidormi added, recalling that parishioners are now realizing Mr. Carpenter took care of even minuscule tasks like controlling the church's heat.

Good man

Mr. Bartholomew, who's been a parish council member for more than two years, said he worked closely with Mr. Carpenter and "can't say a bad word about him -- that's how good he was at what he did."

He summed up Mr. Carpenter's ministry in a simple story: "He was a good cook, and he cooked for every funeral luncheon there was -- and I don't mean out of a box, either. While he was sick, we had three funeral dinners, and he cooked for each one of them -- 20 quarts of soup, homemade.

"It's a tremendous loss. It's hard to go back to not having him here."

(Six parishes in the Albany Diocese currently have a lay administrator or parish life director: St. Patrick's, Cambridge; St. Thomas the Apostle, Cherry Valley; St. Joseph's, Cohoes; St. Clare's, Colonie; St. Alphonsus, Glens Falls; and Immaculate Heart of Mary, Watervliet/Green Island. Another 16 parishes are overseen by a deacon or woman religious, some of whom lead more than one parish.)

(4/13/06) [[In-content Ad]]