I finally 'get' Christmas

By BERNADETTE BONANNO- | Comments: 0 | Leave a comment

I don't get jokes and Super Bowl commercials as quickly as others do. Unless I consciously focus, these things float right over my head. It takes me a while to figure things out. When I finally do, I don't forget, because it has often been a lot of work getting there.

Years ago, anticipating the Christmas season, I purchased a magazine to get ideas for celebrating with our four little boys. The cover featured a beautiful young mom wearing festive clothing, holding an adorable baby in an elf outfit. The pages were filled with orderly, creatively-decorated homes and tips on how to easily achieve all this Christmas loveliness.

Our house looked nothing like the pictures. Our ornaments were pine cones the boys had collected and dipped in glue and candy sprinkles. Our angel was purchased in a dollar store. We had to elevate our tree because the baby was trying to climb it.

To paint an accurate picture, the only time the cushions were on the couch was when the boys went to bed and my husband, Mike, and I picked everything up. As soon as the boys awoke, the cushions became a fort with blankets and sheets. Tipped on its side, the piano bench became a defensive wall.

One article suggested, "When celebrating the birth of the Prince of Peace, establish a no-gun policy." Never much for guns, I decided this was a noble idea - until sticks and my plastic spatulas became guns. It occurred to me that our boys were adept at making authentic machine gun sounds before they could speak words. I tossed the magazine in the trash.

In an effort to foster faith in our young family, we bought a nativity set made of resin so the boys could hold the figures and retell the story of Jesus' birth. Everything was going well until the kids went to bed and Mike and I began our nightly cleanup.

Joseph and the shepherds were missing from the crèche. We found them stuck in opposite sides of the couch, with pieces of straw positioned in their hands like guns. They were shooting at each other.

After a few frustrating years, I stopped reading the advice of "experts" and finally got it: The meaning of Christmas was not something I could create or buy. Christmas is a sacred celebration of the coming of our Savior, who is with us and for us.

Recently, Mike and I went on a retreat at the Weston Priory Monastery in Vermont. I enjoy retreats. They force me to focus. Without TV, phone, computer and radio distractions, it's like having a meeting with "me" when I haven't seen "me" in a while.

Before eating dinner, one of the monks joined the small group of visitors. He quietly spoke only when addressed. One man asked him, "What do you think will happen to your monastery when so few men are joining your order?"

The monk gently smiled and said, "This is not my concern. My only concern is to have God's love and purpose reflected in my own life. The rest is in God's hands." An unspoken "wow" permeated the air as we entered the dining room to eat our meal in silence.

I thought to myself, "Now, that's a pretty good idea to focus on this Christmas."

(Mrs. Bonanno attends St. Mary's parish in Albany. She can be reached at [email protected].)[[In-content Ad]]