How fat is the president?

The image of objective newspeople faded a little more into thin air recently when ten of them showed up on "The Late Show with David Letterman" to make fun of President Clinton as a fatso and a pervert.

The occasion was a performance of Dave's famous "Top Ten List," a nightly comedy feature during which he reads ten funny items, like "the top ten ways Michael Jackson is preparing to become a father" or "the top ten ways you know your neighbor won the lottery." It's a popular segment on his show and has spun off into a successful series of books.

On this particular occasion, Dave's show was broadcasting from Washington, D.C., and he invited top news folks to read the list for him. It was titled "Questions I have always wanted to ask the President."

Fat and sleazy

Here are some samples along with the media people who read them:

* Fred Barnes of "The McLaughlin Group": "Are you sure you didn't have anything to do with Madonna's baby?"

* Cokie Roberts of ABC News: "Have you ever met Batman?"

* Sam Donaldson of ABC's "Primetime Live": "Will you please tell us once and for all -- is Perot nuts?"

* Helen Thomas, White House bureau chief for UPI: "Why is it that you're always jogging but you never seem to lose any weight?"

* John McLaughlin of "The McLaughlin Group": "Does being president help you get a better table at Hooters?"

Other queries were delivered by Jane Robelot of CBS's "This Morning"; Wolf Blitzer, CNN's senior White House correspondent; Greta Van Susteren, co-host of CNN's "Burden of Proof"; Michael Kinsley, editor of Slate, an on-line magazine; and Frank Sesno, a CNN vice president and co-host of "Late Edition."

While delivered under the guise of questions Dave would ask, the voicing of them by the newsmen and women reinforced the common belief that they are not objective reporters. Whenever journalists, even ones who are paid to give opinions rather than report the news, show up on comedy shows like Dave's or "Murphy Brown," they demean their profession.

Hopefully

The content of those jokes about President Clinton contrasts sharply with Bob Hope's humor, which has been aimed at various chief executives over the years:

* On FDR: "He asked me [to entertain the troops during World War II]. I asked him where I should go. He answered, 'I don't know. Just follow Eleanor.'"

* On Truman: "Everyone laughed at Truman and his piano but little do they know that it was because of his playing that his neighbors first sent him to Congress."

* On Eisenhower: "He says he'll run if he's drafted. The last guy who ran when he was drafted is doing five-to-ten at Alcatraz."

* On JFK: "Kennedy's mother said, 'You have a choice. Do you want to go to camp this year or run for president?'"

Poking gentle fun of a president's piano playing or youthfulness is a far cry from ridiculing his eating or sexual habits.

How much of the current disdain for and cynicism about politics is attributable to nightly attacks on the president and other political figures by Letterman, Jay Leno and Conan O'Brien?

How much of yours is?

(12-12-96)

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