April 6, 2018 at 1:53 p.m.
MINISTRY
Funeral choirs can sing out for those with catch in throat
Mollie Crumrine, music minister at St. Patrick's Church in Ravena, has been the head of its funeral choir since its inception.
"We're not there to perform," she said. "We're there to do a ministry. We're not there just to provide music; we're there to provide support for the family."
Giving voice
According to Ms. Crumrine, the funeral choir grants mourners the courage to sing in a situation where song seems impossible. "They need to know that they are not there just to listen to a soloist," she said.While some funerals fill the church with friends and family, sometimes the choir can be larger than the mourners. In those situations, said Ms. Crumrine, the presence of the choir is crucial.
"That's when you really feel the importance of your ministry," she noted.
Moment's notice
Retirees are particularly suited for ministry in the funeral choir because of the sporadic and daytime nature of the ministry, according to Ms. Crumrine."It's nice to have a good number of people involved, because not everyone can be present at each service on short notice," she said.
St. Patrick's choir, which has 12 members, rehearses five or six times a year. If a family requests a new piece of music, they gather for extra rehearsals.
Funeral choirs "start small," said Ms. Crumrine. "The more people get familiar with it, the more people tend to join it. Being a smaller group, we're a wonderful community."
Sharing talent
While some members also sing at the weekly Sunday Mass, the funeral choir allows women like B.J. Costanza, who can't make that commitment, a chance to minister to others through music.Ms. Costanza, who travels on weekends to visit her children, believes that "by belonging to the bereavement choir, I'm doing my share."
A member of the St. Patrick's community for more than 35 years, she often knows the grieving families personally. "It's a way for me to give to the family," she said of her ministry. "I'm concerned about what they're feeling. They know their lost loved ones would be appreciative of what we do."
Anne Schaffer, a 33-year member of the parish who serves as cantor with the choir, said of her ministry: "Sometimes, it's very hard, especially if I've been close to the family. Knowing the comfort that they are getting and that they are celebrating the person with music is very important."
Final hymns
Ms. Costanza said that the funeral choir is especially important when "the deceased is real, real old, and their family is gone, and there's no one left. I feel we do a great service by not letting them be alone" in their grief."So many families have come back later to say how the music really touched them and helped them through a hard time," Mrs. Schaffer said. "People have been saying that they feel the presence of God through the music."
Noted Ms. Crumrine: "They feel very much supported in their loss. So much is expressed through music. It makes it easier for the people to feel what they need to feel."
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