Faith and Family

"Oh, God! Toast!" the toddler squeals as his grandmother puts his favorite snack before him.

"Mom! Bug!" he shouts as he grabs his mother's hand to take her to see an ant he's found.

"Ooooh, Cat," he reverently whispers as he lays on the ground at his great-grandparent's house next to the cat he visits frequently.

Natural wonder

"With children, everything is discovery, and they're living in the present moment," said Sister Bridget Mary Meehan, SFCC, author of "Prayers, Activities, Celebrations and More for Catholic Families" (Twenty-Third Publications). "There is so much parents can learn from children."

Sister Bridget said parents can deepen their own understanding of what it means to be spiritual when they look at toast, bugs or cats with a child. "It helps us to open our eyes, ears and hearts to what is really around us, to the ordinary miracles offered to us each day," she stated.

Growing in God

While being a child's primary educator on his or her spiritual journey can seem like an awesome task, experts say it's a job that parents can do.

"Parents often think about being the primary educator in a school sense," said Joyce Solimini, associate director of elementary and adolescent catechesis for the Albany diocesan Office of Religious Education. "Parents need to let go of all of the stereotypes. It's about nurturing a relationship. The role of parents is to kindle a spark of life and love. The spark is already there."

School of life

While formal religious instruction is important, the day-to-day loving interactions parents have with their children are critical to the child's spiritual development, say the experts. Children experience God's love when they experience parental love.

"Families are where the intimate relationships that shape our ideals, values, identity and spirituality for life are formed," Sister Bridget explains in her book. "When a baby experiences warmth and affection, that child learns trust. Parents who embrace and cuddle their infant with tenderness give their child his or her first images of God's unconditional love and acceptance. These childhood experiences of intimacy and love mold our future relationships with others, as well as our relationship with God."

Faith development

"Little kids come to faith through imitation and sensory experiences," she said. "With teens, we have to be real with them. Our actions and words must be genuine. Teens pick up on parental attitudes. If we exude a sense of hopefulness, kids will pick up on that."

Tending to a child's faith development involves making the connection between God and everyday life, Mrs. Solimini said, urging parents to point out God's presence in the world.

"When you're walking on the beach and you see a sunset, or after a rain when you see a rainbow, say: `Isn't God's nature wonderful!'" she said. "Or when a new baby is born, say: `When I look into your baby brother's eyes, I experience God's love for us.' When you're making up with your child after an argument, say: `When we made up, I felt God's peace.'"

God's presence

God is present when a parent helps a child with homework, when a family does the dishes, and when a parent does errands or makes dinner.

In "Follow the Way of Love," a 1993 pastoral message of the U.S. Catholic bishops, they state: "The profound and the ordinary moments of daily life -- mealtimes, workdays, vacations, expressions of love and intimacy, household chores, caring for a sick child or elderly parent, and even conflicts over things like how to celebrate holidays, discipline children, or spend money -- all are threads from which you can weave a pattern of holiness."

Christian action

She suggests using news stories as starting points for teaching moral values. If a family reads something in a newspaper or sees something on television that seems unjust, they should do something as a family about it.

Writing letters to elected representatives, volunteering to help the underprivileged and visiting the homebound are all ways families can participate in the mission of the Church and teach children at the same time.

"Children learn by doing," explained Mrs. Solimini. "Participating in the mission of the Church forms faith in a real way."

Stories of faith

Family celebrations are also important for families striving to pass on the Catholic faith.

"Ritual builds identity," stated Mrs. Solimini. "We are a people that ritualize all of the time. Look at graduations and holidays. This builds relationships."

She also stressed that parents can pass on the faith by being themselves. "You don't have to be a theologian to do it," she said. "It's being themselves and knowing that God dwells in human hearts and human homes."

(07-23-98) [[In-content Ad]]