---

"It's different for everybody," says Allyssa, an advocate with the domestic violence program at Catholic Charities of Herkimer County.

Allyssa's last name is being withheld for privacy reasons, as are the names of her clients, but their stories are harrowing.

The advocate talked about one woman who was being abused by her husband: She came home to see a single bullet sitting on a shelf. Her husband didn't say anything, just left it there.

"That's psychological abuse," Allyssa told The Evangelist.

Another woman went to bed, only to find that her pillow was soaked with gasoline and a lighter sitting on her nightstand.

Allyssa says it is a common misconception that abuse is just physical.

At Catholic Charities' Scho­harie County office, domestic violence program director Angela Smith said that advocating for victims of domestic violence is not easy, but everyone at the agency is able to rely on one another.

"The best motivation in this job is when you work with families and they are able to go forward successfully," Mrs. Smith told The Evangelist.

Giving shelter
Catholic Charities in Schoharie County offers both residential and non-residential programs for people dealing with domestic violence. Its emergency shelter has nine rooms available for up to 90 days.

People who stay there get all of their needs met, including food and personal care items. There are counseling services and support groups, as well as advocates to help people in need understand and receive the services to which they are entitled. A financial assistance program can help with gas, clothing, medicine or other necessities as needed.

"If they come in with needs in family court or [they] need an order of protection, then an advocate would work with them," Mrs. Smith explained. Advocates gather paperwork and information of behalf of clients.

Herkimer County Catholic Charities has similar programs under the direction of Jacqueline Ward. During 2015, there were 158 new cases opened by the agency. There were also 28 adults and 28 children who benefitted from the safe dwelling house.

"We have a supervised visitation center," Ms. Ward noted. "That's so families experiencing domestic violence have a safe alternative for visitation. We have staff supervise the visit."

The Herkimer County program served 524 individuals last year alone.

Faith-based
A parishioner of Annunciation Church in Ilion, Ms. Ward stressed that her faith influences her work. She views it as a calling.

"I try to certainly be non-judgmental to everyone's situation," she said. "If they have been steered in our direction, we have to help."

Mrs. Smith said she strives to treat each client as an individual with specific needs.

Catholic Charities in Schoharie County provides more services, too: namely, HopeLine phone accessibility and confidential addresses.

HopeLine phones are provided by Verizon so that victims of domestic violence have a way of communicating using a new, secure number. Verizon collects customers' old cell phones and chargers and donates them to various non-profit organizations in the United States.

The confidential addresses come through New York State's Address Confidentiality Program. Mail is processed at one address and then forwarded to another, all with strict confidentiality.

As Allyssa spoke about her work, she stressed that victim blaming is never productive.

"You can't always know" someone's circumstances, she said. "Hindsight is 20/20."

Both Catholic Charities programs have 24/7 helplines. For Schoharie County, the helpline number is (518) 234-2231; for Herkimer County, call (315) 866-0458. Catholic Charities also has a domestic violence program serving Saratoga, Warren and Washington Counties; its 24/7 helpline is (518) 793-9496. [[In-content Ad]]

---