April 6, 2018 at 1:53 p.m.
HELPING HANDS
Catholic Charities' mentoring program matches college students and children
But on Saturday afternoons on the campus of Skidmore College in Saratoga Springs, these children can escape their worries and just be kids.
Paired with student mentors through Saratoga Mentoring Program, operated by Catholic Charities of Saratoga, Warren and Washington Counties, children are bused in by school districts to spend three hours doing whatever they want, from swimming to board games, watching a movie, participating in special activities or having a free lunch at the dining hall.
During a recent session, 10-year-old Shaylee made a bat out of cupcake frosting for Halloween with her mentor, Skidmore senior Emily Damon. The duo has been "matched" since Ms. Damon was a sophomore.
'Like sisters'
"Me and Emily are like actual sisters," Shaylee told The Evangelist. "We like a lot of the same things. She's really creative and a lot of fun.
"She encourages me to jump off the diving board when I do not want to," she continued. "When we first went swimming, I did not know how to swim. The best thing about her is she encourages people."
With Ms. Damon's help, Shaylee has picked up new hobbies like rollerblading. She says learning new things means you can "teach more people."
She and Ms. Damon were "both really shy" at first, she continued; they've "helped each other."
Ms. Damon agreed: "[Volunteering] really grounds you," she said. "I think you get involved with your own stuff and college drama. It makes you realize how privileged you are."
The mentor has watched Shaylee gain confidence: "She really advocates for herself a lot more. She takes to people more."
Sometimes, Ms. Damon just listens to Shaylee's concerns about home life or being bullied at school, on the bus or at her apartment complex.
"It's hard to know what to say all the time because, obviously, I get very defensive of her," Ms. Damon said.
Program details
The Saratoga Mentoring Program, a 22-year-old Catholic Charities service, supports about 40 matches at a time. Since 2006, half of the mentors have been Skidmore students; the other half are community volunteers who pick children up at home and take them on outings.
All the mentors go through an application process, have background checks and spend time with children's families before getting matched.
Children generally get placed between the ages of five and 15 through a referral from school staff, social service agencies or relatives. They often come from low-income backgrounds, struggle with school, or just need attention they can't get anywhere else.
"A lot of them have had really negative experiences with adults in their lives," said Brenda Jensen, the program director. "I hope we show them they actually can trust people, [that] there are genuinely kind and generous people. A lot of the kids don't feel heard in their lives or at school.
"An adult is choosing to spend hours a week with a child," she continued. "They get a feeling of, 'I'm worthy. I'm important.' Our hope is that leads to them making better choices."
Mentors aren't tutors, but they sometimes read with their charges or serve as liaisons with school staff.
"For some families," Mrs. Jensen said, "putting food on the table and finding out where they're going to live next month is what's important. Sometimes it's the parents [or grandparents] who lack confidence. They didn't have a successful school experience; it's very uncomfortable and awkward for them" to communicate with schools.
Cool kids
Spending time on a college campus makes higher education seem more "tangible" for some children, Mrs. Jensen said. The Skidmore program also gives the children relatable role models.
"They're so automatically cool to the kids," Mrs. Jensen said. "There's a lot of power to their age."
College mentors call and email during summer months and if they study abroad for a semester. Children with attachment disorders don't get matched with young adults who plan on being away. Matches can last during an entire college career; some keep in touch beyond that, and others stop.
"We tell kids that most relationships do have a beginning, a middle and an end, and that's healthy and normal," Mrs. Jensen said.
Gracen Cloud Walter, a Skidmore senior, has been mentoring 14-year-old Emma since she started at the school. The pair emailed each other when Ms. Cloud Walter spent a semester in Peru.
Ms. Cloud Walter participates in Skidmore Saturdays, but can also pick Emma up and take her bowling, swimming and to the nail salon. At the college, they play piano and racquetball.
"I just like hanging out and having fun," Emma said. "I know I can trust her, and I know that she understands me."
Ms. Cloud Walter agreed: "She has three brothers and sisters, so it's nice she can do whatever she wants. She gets someone who always will listen and is always on her side."
Nicer than expected
Siblings Elizabeth, 10, and GC, 12, were spending time with new Skidmore mentors on a recent Saturday. Elizabeth remembers the fun she had with her old one: "We did each other's nails in her room. She had pink and purple flowers on her walls. One time, she French-braided my hair."
After spending time at the program, "now I'm not scared to be near people," Elizabeth said. "I always hid behind my brother when I was younger."
GC has enjoyed meeting new people and learning that people are "more nice than I expected." He's out of sorts lately about being grounded for his "attitude" and likes time away from home because, he said, there's too much yelling there.
Funding needs
Saratoga Mentoring is funded by the Saratoga County Youth Bureau, the United Way, Catholic Charities fundraising and donations. Grants would supplement the staff - Mrs. Jensen, an intern and two Skidmore work-study students - with casework and administrative support and allow the program to give families financial support.
Mrs. Jensen does some crisis intervention, social service referrals and case management for the children; the program helps with summer camp scholarships, back-to-school supplies and Thanksgiving food baskets for their families.
The Saratoga Mentoring Program has a waiting list of 10 girls and 20 boys; there's always a shortage of male mentors. Grants are hard to come by in Saratoga: The county has a 6.3 percent poverty rate; the city, a 7.1 percent rate.
"If you look at Saratoga Springs on paper, it does not look like we have these problems," Mrs. Jensen said. But "some kids have 16 pairs of sneakers, and some have none."[[In-content Ad]]
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