April 6, 2018 at 1:53 p.m.

Abstinence workshops offer message of hope on teenage sexuality


By MAUREEN MCGUINNESS- | Comments: 0 | Leave a comment

More than 300 people from across the Albany Diocese and New York State crammed hotel meeting rooms last week to take part in "Care To Make A Difference," a diocesan-sponsored conference designed to assist professionals in promoting sexual abstinence.

Educators, social workers, parents, catechists, clergy and others attended the day-long event, which consisted of ten workshops, a keynote address and a panel discussion.

Each workshop addressed different aspects of abstinence education, including the importance of character education, self-esteem and sexuality; the emotional aspects of sex outside of marriage; and the media's role in promoting sexual activity among young people. Information on 20 abstinence curriculums and programs was also available for participants to review.

Attendees pleased

"I will travel to any conference that addresses abstinence," said Zoe McCulley, a prevention counselor from Saranac Lake (Essex County.) "This was a refreshing perspective. I was encouraged to hear values addressed. I work in public schools so I have to be careful what is taught."

For Laura Weber, director of faith formation at Our Lady of Grace Church in Ballston Lake, the conference changed her perspective on how much abstinence education a parish must do. "It opened my eyes," she said. "We need to do more than offer two sessions."

Currently, her parish religious ed program offers one six-week mini-course for junior high students on sex and sexuality, and another for high school aged parishioners. "I plan to do more," she said. "I really learned a lot."

Sex ed criticized

A theme in the keynote address by Thomas Lickona, an internationally recognized authority on character education and a professor at the State University of New York at Cortland, was that what is known as "comprehensive sex education" has failed.

Comprehensive sex education, found in public schools, is based on four premises, he said: Teenage sexual activity is inevitable; educators should be value-neutral regarding sex; schools should openly discuss sexual matters; and sex education should teach students about contraception.

The results of that method of sex education, he said, are that teen pregnancy and abortion rates continue to increase despite the government funding of comprehensive sex education; and studies commissioned by proponents of comprehensive sex education found that teens who took these courses were significantly more likely to initiate sexual intercourse than teens whose sex education courses did not discuss contraceptives.

Statistics up

According to Kristine Napier, RN, of Cleveland's Responsible Social Values Program and a workshop presenter, despite comprehensive sex education:

* 1.2 million unwed pregnancies happen every year,

* 20 million new cases of sexually transmitted diseases occur each year,

* the number of sexually transmitted diseases has increased from two diseases in the 1960s to more than 20 diseases of consequence today, and

* cervical cancer rates among teenage girls have skyrocketed.

Emotional effects

While the physical ramifications of teenage sexual activity are significant, the emotional damage is just as rampant and destructive, according to both speakers.

"Emotional problems can have damaging, even crippling effects on a person's ability to lead a happy and productive life," Dr. Lickona said.

Despite that, parents and teachers are often at a loss for words when it comes to discussing that aspect of sex, he said, probably because no one ever discussed it with them.

For that reason, Dr. Lickona feels it is important for parents to be involved in their child's sex education. Programs that bring children as young as elementary school students together with their parents lay the foundation for adults to talk to their children about the emotional aspects of sex. One program based on that model has a near zero pregnancy rate for its graduates, he noted.

Abstinence

Abstinence programs, which are also known as directive sex education, deal with the emotional aspects of sex and can be very powerful in their effect, the speakers said. According to Mrs. Napier, abstinence programs help young people live without regret, have hope for the future, maintain control of their lives, and build a stronger foundation for their future.

Mrs. Napier and others in the field have found that young people practicing abstinence achieve greater goals academically and in extracurricular activities, have more respect for themselves and others, and reach a higher socio-economic income.

The reasons for those findings, she said, are that young people having sex become consumed with worries about pregnancy and disease, and are often racked with guilt, suffer from poor self-esteem, and find themselves in a spiral of destruction. Once they are having sex, their thoughts and time are spent dealing with the ramifications of this rather than enjoying their teenage years.

"When you read teen magazines, girls write in about feeling guilty and embarrassed by their choice to have sex," Mrs. Napier said. "Sixty-two percent of girls who had been sexually active wished they'd waited. No matter how old they were, they didn't think they were old enough."

Hunger for message

Adults aren't the only ones concerned with promoting abstinence. "Kids are hungry for the message," Mrs. Napier said. "There is never a classroom that when we leave, we don't hear a child say `Thank you. You made a difference.' No one expects them to be abstinent."

Surprisingly, many parents are the ones who don't believe in abstinence. "The hardest customers are parents," she said. "Many parents don't believe it can work."

Abstinence can work, according to the presenters, because the programs include values and give students ideals to live up to, Dr. Lickona explained.

"If we set our expectations high, teens rise to meet them," he stated. "If we set them low, they will meet those. The problem won't be solved until there is a new ethic of sexual responsibility. Sexual behavior is determined by values, not mere knowledge."

(Audio tapes of the keynote and workshops are available for $7 each or $75 for the set, plus a shipping and handling fee. To order, contact the diocesan Family Life Office at 453-6677). [[In-content Ad]]


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