April 6, 2018 at 1:53 p.m.
PERSPECTIVE
A love letter to children applying for college
A love letter to children applying for college
For our children who are anxiously awaiting college responses, the early decisions and early-admissions responses are beginning to trickle in. Rolling admissions will follow, and by April, you will know what your choices are. It is a time of intense hope and fear, stress and excitement, joy or disappointment.
Whatever the outcome, there are a few things we parents really want you to know:
1. Try not to take the college application process personally.
In many cases, it truly is dictated by demographics, economics and "fit." There is a morass of students who "look" just like you on paper. In some cases, the decision could end up seeming as random as simply pulling one out of a pile. If it's not your application they pull, then it wasn't meant to be.
Admissions officers generally know what they're looking for. Sometimes, their choices will protect you from ending up at a school where you would not have ultimately been happy. Remember, scientists have found that, even when throwing dice over and over, eventually a pattern will emerge. The things that seem the most random in life often later reveal a meaningful outcome. Trust the process.
2. You are not defined by the colleges who reject or accept you.
There will be many rejections and acceptances as you go through your life. Never let any of them define who you are. Don't fall into the trap of looking for your reflection in other people's eyes. Your true value cannot be defined by those who don't think you are "the right one," or even by those who think you're great. Your value is independent of all tangible things. You are valuable, valued and loved more than you could ever imagine.
3. Have faith.
You have a heavenly Father who loves you with unconditional, boundless love. When it seems like everything is working against you, He is working for you. His plan is not our plan. If you don't get into your first-, second- or even third-choice school, you can be sure there is a very good reason.
There is something valuable waiting for you in God's perfect time, in the place of His choosing. When your journey doesn't go in the direction you thought it would, chances are He is planning something more wonderful than you could have ever imagined for yourself. Trust Him. When the path gets rocky, reach for His hand. He will always be there. As the saying goes, "When God leads you to it, He will lead you through it."
4. You are not the sum total of your accomplishments.
Reputations are fleeting. They come and go. Do things for the right reasons. Help people. Love people. Show compassion. Everyone you meet, regardless of their circumstances, is a child of God. Show them respect. The human "measuring stick" is limited, but God's love isn't.
5. There is nothing you can't accomplish if you put your mind to it.
Live life to the fullest; make the best of every opportunity. Find the gift in every challenge and be prepared for the challenge in every gift.
Most of all, please know that our hopes and our dreams for you come from our love, but are not and should not be the blueprint for your life. In the end, we kiss you and let you go, and trust that we've done the best we can to give you everything you need.
We really do see who you are and love you unconditionally. We pray that our love gives you wings -- and that, when you grow weary, God's love gives you rest.[[In-content Ad]]
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