Faith formation director gives back to catechists

As a faith formation director, Marge Milanese tried to be on the cutting edge of developments in lay ministry, intergenerational catechesis and retreats. To do this, she received support and help from the Albany Diocese.

"Now, it's payback time," she joked.

Ms. Milanese, now an independent retreat leader and spiritual director, is passing that commitment on to others through a small retreat center in her Waterford home -- and through a new bequest in her will that will help catechetical and adult faith formation in the Diocese.

Money from Ms. Milanese' estate will go to:

* the Sister Eileen Flanagan Scholarship, which enables parish catechists and youth ministry leaders to attend a course at St. Bernard's Institute of Theology and Ministry; and

* a fund that will provide assistance so that laypeople may attend programs at retreat centers.

Prep work

A former Sister of Mercy, Ms. Milanese later became one of the Diocese's first lay directors of faith formation. She calls herself an advocate for training programs for catechists that combine academic and experiential learning, forming catechists in their own faith and giving them skills and knowledge to teach others.

"I am a firm believer in people being prepared for what they do," said Ms. Milanese. "I have been personally indebted to my family and to the community. I feel that God has been carrying me. The things I've found good, I would like to be able to make available to others."

Retreats have always formed a backbone of spirituality for Ms. Milanese, from those she attends to those she has led: Confirmation retreats for students at St. Gabriel's Church in Rotterdam; interdenominational retreats for girls at St. Anne's Institute in Albany; and weekends of prayer at Weston Priory in Vermont for teens at St. Clare's Church in Colonie, where she served as faith formation director for many years.

Retreats shouldn't end at Confirmation, she believes; they are a way adult Catholics can slow down and connect with their faith. It bothers Ms. Milanese that some retreat centers may be in danger of closing due to dwindling attendance. She especially sees retreats in nature as a way for laypeople to recapture a sense of connection to God and discern what God wants for their future.

Recalling, renewing

"The world is so hectic, and our lives can be so frazzled. When we look at the brevity of life, it would seem that people would want to make the best of what you have. Retreat gives you an opportunity to remember your years, to celebrate what was, what is now, and the hope to believe that God has more in store for you," she explained.

Three years ago, Ms. Milanese decided to pursue a lifelong interest in spiritual direction. She completed a certification course through Weston School of Theology in Vermont, and now meets with directees in the Capital Region and in Boston.

"Spiritual direction is companioning with the other in their search for God and meaning," said Ms. Milanese. "I don't do the talking. I might raise a question, but it's not psychotherapy. The third person [in the session] is the Lord; and we always recognize that."

Ms. Milanese has also run Ignatian spirituality retreats for local parishes; her independent retreat house, The Wellness Center, hosts individual private retreats with a focus on holistic health.

"I feel like I've died and gone to heaven in this ministry," she said.

Giving back

One reason she decided to speak out about her bequest was to encourage others to consider a similar gift -- even if they think they can't afford it.

"Working for the Church is not a lucrative business," she said. "But you look back on your life, and you find that God is really there in the good and the not-so-good. I believe my life has been one of total gift from God, and I want people to know that you don't have to be a multi-millionaire to contribute to a cause you believe in."

(To learn more, contact the diocesan Stewardship Office at 453-6680.)

(8/16/07)